Hello! I'm Jeremy! I'm twenty-four and I'm quite ridiculous. I tend to hug people spontaneously and I don't really know when to stop talking. I have the best friends in the world, a cat and a giraffe in the Amsterdam zoo. I often immerse myself in fiction and disappear for days on end. Sorry about that. I like to paint, talk to people and embarrass myself in public.
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-Carlos sits still, a grimace on his lips as if he’s in pain while Remy searches- You sure? Ow! -Carlos examines the hair Remy gave him then loses interest after a few beats- You’re right, Remy. We can’t take any chances!
We’ll go… after we pet the dog? -He stares longingly at the sweater-ed beagle.- A cool giraffe, sounds much more impressive than any normal ‘ol giraffe, I’ll tell you that much old friend. Wait. Does he wear sunglasses? That’s how you know if someone or something is cool… must wear sunglasses. YES! LANGUAGE! First off, Carlos means Carlos. And it also means cheese. -Carlos and Remy walk up to the beagle and it’s owner cautiously.- Hello, miss? Could we possibly pet your dog?
Woops. No! ‘Cause birds in your hair would be bad.
Yes, yes, yes. I should buy Gregory some sunglasses! That’d make him cool officially. He’d be the coolest giraffe in all of Amsterdam! Or maybe even the world — or the universe! [Remy goes wide eyed.] Do you think they have giraffes on Mars? Oh man. That’d be so cool. Why cheese? Remy means Remy and also it means Grape Soda. [Waves at the woman and then points at the dog enthusiastically, nodding along as his friend speaks, attempting to conceal his intoxicated state some.]
Matt in SoHo yesterday
Not that I know of… Do you think there’s some in there now and I don’t know it?! -searches hair frantically, then pauses- Remy, I have something important to ask you… Do you think I should cut my hair?
I don’t birds in, Remy. It’s my hair, not their hair. Only Kacey can hibernate in it, I promised her. I promised her, Remy. These birds can’t just do this. I’m going to cut it. Do you have scissors on you, my tall friend? Speaking of tall, how’s Gregory? He doesn’t want to live in my hair too does he? Swing the word sounds like swing the thing, ya know. Look: swing, swing, swing. See! Yes! Let’s go see the dog. -jumps off swing-
Shhhh. Hold still, hold still, hold still. [Remy gets a grip on Carlos’ hair and begins examining it intensely.] It’s fiiine. [He yanks a couple of strands as if to prove that there’s nothing in his hair.] See, no birds! But I’d cut my hair if I was you. ‘Cause you never know when those sneaky bastards might move in, you know?
We’ll keep the birds out, Carlos. We’ll keep them out. [Remy nods rapidly.] I don’t! I have some back at my apartment though, yeah? Oh! Yes. Gregory is lovely. Fantastic, really. He’s just being a giraffe. But he’s not just any giraffe, he’s a cool giraffe, so he’s like better than any other giraffe. Oh! Yeah! It does. All words should sound like the things that they represent, you know? Carlos. Carlos. Carlos. We should invent a language. Yes! Doggy! [Jumps off after him.]
I love the feel of the wind in my hair.
Swings are amazing… swing is amazing… swinging are amazing… I don’t know Remy, there’s too many options! LOOK AT THAT! Beagle being walked by its owner. It’s wearing a sweater, Remy. IT’S WEARING A SWEATER!
Of course you do! You’ve got so much of it! You could hide in your hair! I could hide in your hair and I’m like realllllllllllly tall. Have birds ever tried to nest in your hair, Carlos? ‘Cause they should it’d be a hell of a lot more comfortable than those twigs.
Swings are perfect! I love swings! Swings! That’s a fun word swing. Swing, swing, swing. It doesn’t even sound like a word, does it? Like toggle or encyclopedia. Oh my God! It’s a dog wearing a sweater! Should I go touch it?
Is that how you say that? Oh! Look at that! Broken Coke bottle.
Probably not, but the way Rigo talks about them sometimes makes them sound rather frightening. It’s nice to know that you’ll fly that far just to lighten the mood a little bit. Picturing the King and Queen of Brazil on a inflatable castle, is a very amusing mental picture. It’s a deal then. I’ll send you one from every major place I visit, and you can do the same.
Well, I can’t assure you that they’re sweethearts or anything, since i haven’t met them, but I’m sure they’re fine. Actually, I’m probably more likely to coach you through the evening on your cell phone via text message, however, I’m really not good at advice. At all. That would be funny though, I imagine. Deal.
A few weeks is fine, as long as you remember to shower on a regular basis.
Yeah, I’m really excited about it. I mean, his parents sound really intimidating… but I’m sure they aren’t that bad. It’s just nerves. I’m sure I could find time to call you, maybe I’ll even send you a few post cards. Okay, well try not to get lost in your wanderings. And send me lots of post cards.
I’ll try my hardest.
Well, they’re probably not as bad as they seem to be, after all people rarely are. If things get uncomfortable, ring me, and I’ll come round with a bouncy castle and some alcohol, break the ice, might make things a teensy bit better. Yes, I will keep that in mind. Lots of post cards.
Well good, I don’t want to drop in on you one day and find you glued to your television.
Uh, I think we might go to Brazil, and then maybe do some travelling around there. I haven’t spent much time in that part of the world, so I’m looking forward to it. But nothing is set in stone. I’d like to see my parents, even if it’s just for a day or two. What about you? Any plans, with anyone - besides me?
I can’t promise that won’t happen for at least a few weeks in June, but I’m hoping to be away from it as much as possible.
Oh! That would be fantastic. Brazil. Take lots of pictures. Call me tons. Keep me updated. I don’t know, I might do. I’m thinking about it. Maybe I’ll wander around Europe. Nicole and I have been talking about taking a visit to Germany. I might pop up in Romania eventually.
I really hope you don’t spend the entire summer watching Netflix. I’d like to see you at least once over the summer.
I’ll be sure to get out a bit.
So, speaking of summer, what’re you doing for it? Going anywhere with The Rig-mister? The Rodster? Nope those are both terrible nicknames, let’s go with Rigo.